when your world crumbles ... really???

i find it funny that people think that their i-phone having a cracked screen is the biggest deal in the world, or are in the throws of a nervous breakdown because after just spending £300.00 on stuff they get home and realize their fav band are going to be doing a gig in their area, and they'll have to wait till next pay day to buy tickets and might ....wait for it....the gods forbid...not be in the front row.

i do get a little pang of bitterness and want to slap them in the face, not only for the hardship i have had/having, but for the fact that their idea of what is important is extremely messed up.

in the world there are people who's major worry is "where will i sleep tonight?", "am i going to be molested again tonight or will he go to sleep?", "how many times will i have my face smacked off the wall today?", "is tonight the night they come with guns to kill my husband, rape me and my girls and take my boys to be part of their army?"... makes the cracked screen on the i-phone 5 a bit null and void huh?

i understand and regularly do use the argument that worry and problems are relevant to circumstance, and that what one person can handle another would be floored by. but i find some of the things i see on social media which are labeled "massive problem", or "serious issue" laughable to the point of almost disgust.

i have been in both situations of having times of lean and times of plenty, I've never been rich but I've been comfortable with a multitude of luxury's, and I've never had to sleep on the streets, worry about rape or being murdered and having my kid taken away to join a guerrilla group.

i grew up spoiled, an only child and i lived with my grandparents, no spoiling grandparent "treats visit" for me ...it was life.

i never went without, i wore designer clothes, had all the latest toys and as i got older, i had regularly updated mobile phones, p.c's, laptops, c.d players which then turned into i-pods, games consoles, pocket money, whatever i wanted.

i stuck in at school, i as a good kid, a good teen, never in trouble, didn't do drugs or stay out later than i was allowed, i didn't party, lost my virginity AFTER high school. i got good grades, did my homework.

i then went to college and studied in several different subjects, and worked while i was there, at one point i worked a night shift job and then would do college during the day, then worked 2 jobs while i was at university.

i worked hard in academia and in work, and after i had my daughter i moved in with my then fiance, and i worked 2 jobs and a couple of financially beneficial side lines (nothing dodgie or illegal), i payed my bills i stayed on top of my responsibilities and i could spend money and i spent on my daughter like she was the princess of the world.

i did...what you're told to do,  be good, go to school, get a job, pay your bills, take care of your responsibilities.

so after a few years of relationship changes, job changes, hour cuts, family fall outs, living with a flat mate....

i found myself, broke, struggling, going hungry, up to my eyeballs in debt, heart broken, and homeless, going from friends house to friends house, and then moving in with my new partner of only a couple of weeks in his one bedroom house.

i did with the help of some wonderful friends end up in the awesome house i am in now, with my partner, my daughter and my dog. my daughter was in a good nursery and is starting a good school after the holidays.

i do my housework, i pay my bills, i try to get myself out of some of the debts i built up, i am self employed but my business eats more money than it makes, I'm looking into doing another degree at uni, i vlog, i blog, i model, i work out, i cook i clean, i educate my daughter, I'm looking for a part time job and i have my little social life.

i pay my way and i work and learn and i take care of my responsibilities, do i get hand outs? no, do i get grants to furbish my house? no, do i get money to feed my habits? no

but if i was lazy and chose a life of living off benefits I'd have it all handed to me, why did i bother with an education and working and paying my tax and having my 1st child in my late 20's instead of when i was 13, I'd have been financially a lot better off if I'd done everything i wasn't supposed to.

but even now i do what i can but i don't have any money for luxuries, i can't get to the pub every weekend, after losing weight i couldn't go buy a new wardrobe - i have to make do, even with the bras that are now 2 cup sizes too big, my new rocks have big gaping holes down the feet, my bed is broken, my ps3 yellow lighted (broken), i can't replace it or upgrade it, my laptop gave up and i'm only online through the kindness of a friend loaning me one of his extra p.c towers and setting it up on the little TV from my bedroom.

i don't get to do "haul" videos anymore because i never get to buy anything, my dog caught fleas and i had to save for 2 weeks to afford the stuff to get rid of them, my blackberry broke and I'm using an old phone that's more than 5 years old but woe the cracked screen on your i-phone 5...take mine i don't mind a cracked screen.  i haven't been to a concert since i was in London in 2012 to see Nightwish, i haven't played World of Warcraft in well over a year because i don't have the £8 fee.

i live week to week, sometimes starving to make sure my daughter still gets toys and nice clothes while i have clothes 3 sizes too big, bras i can't fill anymore, and boots with holes in them, on my old phone and borrowed computer, sleeping in my broken bed, continually exhausted from work, housework, fitting in a social life and then recent worries and stresses of my Grandad being in hospital and spending almost every day up there too.

but i am so sorry to hear about your cracked i-phone 5 screen, that is a shame especially when you worked so hard moaning at your Daddy (even though you're in your 20's) for the whole of two days to get it, to go with your car, i-pod, P.S4, X-box one, touch screen 3d T.V, and the £400 you spent on your trip to buy clothes, for your holiday to Spain after you get back from T in the park, and how hard your Saturday job is and it really is so sad that you only get minimum wage and have to work a whole TWELVE HOURS A WEEK!!? that's outrageous.

my deepest condolences , however will you cope?

I'm a good listener and no matter how broke i am i can always spare a cup of coffee if you need to talk it out.